We are their superhero!!!

Have you ever felt like you aren't capable of being a great mother? Like you might fail them because

of the things that you have done in your past, or because you don't feel qualified enough. Having children is the one thing that people can give advice on, but in the end it is all trial and error.

Even now that I have been a mom for a while sometimes I still feel "can I do this and not mess these beautiful babies up"? With my attitude that I am working on everyday, I worry. I pray that they don't have the same type of attitude I have. We are the person the look up to just like their favorite superhero.

I know that my mouth has got me into a whole lot of trouble and I don't want that for them. Making sure that they don't see me getting in to it with people is a big deal to me. I am learning that control is the key to making sure it doesn't happen.

I get so scared with all these crazy folks that are in this world. We send are kids to school to get the best education they can get, and not to be hurt. Sariah and I were talking the other day and she told me that she didn't know if she wanted to go to first grade because she was nervous about the kids. Also she is worried that the teacher wont teach her anything. It is time for superhero mom to the rescue.

That is something that I am worried about all the time too. I think as a mom we always worry about the little things. Am I going to mess them up? Is this world so messed up that it might interfere with my children way of life?

I want more then anything in this world to always protect them, but I know that all I can do is make sure I teach them the ways of the world. As I am getting ready to send Sariah to school in the next couple of weeks I am making sure that I teach her, right and wrong.

Never again will I allow for her to get beat up and think that if she fights back that she will get in trouble with me. My poor little girl thought because the teachers say "If you fight or touch someone else, you will have to flip a card. Also you will be a bad kid." that she couldn't defend herself. Not ever will this happen.

It is very important that no matter what age you sit down with your kids and explain to them the importance of self defense, and bullies. They are in every school people. Don't be naïve and think that your child is safe.

As a mother it is are job to lead and protect. Make a difference and talk everyday with your kids. It will help them in the end, and make you feel more capable to be their mom. Having an open door policy with them is key to great parenting. After all we are their superhero mom.

If you don't have an open door someone else will. Not a good look, nor is that the safest thing in todays world.

Thank you for reading and I love you all.

Put them first!

Right, and even if you are 21
it does not make it right!!!

Do you dedicate yourself to work, friends, or something that you love to do? If you can answer "yes", then why are you not dedicating yourself to your children. I see a lot of mothers that I went to school with, and all I see is them partying. I cant for the life of me understand how you can have children and expect that your life isn't supposed to change even a little.

Your mom/ dad or even your grandparents didn't make the choice to have those babies. You did. Okay so maybe you feel like "I wasn't ready to become a mother"., but honey reality is you are a mother. You have to stop thinking selfishly. It is time to take care of those responsibilities .

Not everyone should be!!!

I am not saying roll over and die. No ma'am, but I a saying take care of your damn kids and stop clubbing and spending your last to get all done up. I have a right to my opinion and I am can express it how I feel. If this hurts someone I will not apologize for it.

As a women that takes care of her children faithfully with a mommy me time date here and there I have the right to say "you are being wrong and selfish". Now what I am about to say might hurt so brace yourself. If you cant handle the truth you might want to leave now.

I see a great deal of women shopping for themselves and going to the hair and nail shop, to get all beautiful for a few hours out on the town. While your kids sit at home with only bread, peanut butter and jelly for dinner. No new clothes or shoes to wear, but the hand me downs someone gave you. I cant understand.

Now you may be saying "my kids got clothes, shoes and a lot of food". Okay then how about one better. Your kids at home being raised by your parents. You think that when they get older they aren't going to remember? That is something that they will be throwing in your face later on in life when you try to discipline them.

You may think partying is only for right now, but honey let me tell you "your kids will only be small once, and all these memories that you are missing out on you can get them back".

Stop being self absorbed and think about those innocent babies. They need you more then you could even know. Moms are so special to children. I see how my girls look at me and it melts my heart. They lean on me for direction, clean clothes, food and so much more. I couldn't even fathom allowing someone else the opportunity to take care of my girls and my son.

I look forward to waking up in the morning and making breakfast for the girls (even though I hate cooking breakfast). It is a time that I cherish. I love hearing what they dreamed about. It takes me back to when I was innocent and nothing in this world mattered to me but my mom. It is amazing. To live life through the eyes of your kids.

Take the time to evaluate yourself. I am not checking your pocket books, but you should. Materialistic things wont buy your kids love. Time is the only thing that will get you that indescribable love only your kids can give you. They aren't judging you by the clothes you have, the nails you wear and the hair you buy. Come on ladies, its time to step it up and put those kids first....

Thank you for reading. I just needed to vent. I had to get this off my chest. I feel so bad for these babies. Love you all.

Do you!!!

"I need a break from the kids, I just want some me time". Can anyone else relate to this? I am almost

I took some time for myself, and I enjoyed
every moment. Tamar and I at her concert.
Meet and greet baby!!!

sure that every mom goes through this. I see a lot of people asking me questions about not losing themselves. Well I believe that the one way is to definitely have some mommy me time.

Some moms are scared to take a few hours to themselves. I am not saying that you need to leave the country and go away for a week. Just a couple of hours away will do you some good. I know that I like to take a trip to the nail shop and then to Barnes and noble. That is me though. There are so many things that you can do in a short amount of time that will take you away from all the madness going on at home. Yes I did just say madness.

When your house looks like a tornado went through it, and the kids are screaming at each other and fighting. When your husband seems like he has a stick up his ass. It is time to do something for you. You deserve it. You are the glue that holds the family together so why shouldn't you go out and take your mind away for a second?

Since moving away from my friends and family I have only done a few things for me. My most favorite thing was going to Tamar Braxton's concert. Yes, I went by myself and had the time of my life. I notice that having kids has given me the courage to step out on my own. Something that I would have never done back home if I didn't have kids.

I am starting to find "Myself". This is something a lot of moms struggle with. Your whole identity is not "mom". Don't ever forget that. That is only apart of who you are, not a whole. Once you can look in the mirror and recognize this then you will finally be able to set a side a day and time for just you.

For me it is hard because I stay at home with the kids and Shawn is always working to provide for our family, but if he is home for the day mommy is stepping out to do her. I don't do clubs because I don't like to be around a bunch of ignorant people that can only seems to express themselves because they have been drinking. Now I am not judging those of you that like the club, but this momma say "No Thank You".

If you don't feel good about yourself and know who you are, how can you teach your children to find who they are? It is impossible. We give so much of ourselves that we end up losing "us". It is time to take some of "you" and treat it with love and care. I say "date yourself".  Get all done up and do you. Stop worrying about what others will think and say. Who cares?

As a mom we are superheroes in our own right. Even superheroes need a break. Remember if mom isn't happy, then no one is happy. Enjoy the women that you are. Hit up the nail shop, spa or take yourself to a movie. Although, why hide all that sexy in the dark, okay!!!

I love you all for reading. I hope this helped someone.

Building memories one day at a time.

One thing that is so very important to me is making memories with my kids. If I don't then who will? Our time here on this precious earth is not guaranteed. God forbid anything were to happen I want there to be pictures and memories built of our family.

My girls like some of the most simplest things in life. Just taking a drive down to the strip and walking through the hotels, makes them happy, as does it for me. We enjoy the beautifulness of the figuring's and gardens throughout. Also they have some of the best shopping as well.

Yesterday we decided to go walking through what I think is truly a  magnificent hotel. The Wynn. I mean the view of the waterfall, and the flower garden inside is so breathtaking. My girls kept asking to take pictures. Yep, they are definitely mine.

After which we went across the street and walked around the best mall on the strip (like one that

regular people can afford, lol). My girls were so excited to watch the fashion show that they do in the center of the mall. They said " We want to do that as well". Whatever they want they can have if they put their minds to it.

I am so in love with these moments between us. Making memories is a must and as a family it is something that I cherish and keep close to my heart. When I was younger we didn't have much money, I mean my mom raised 4 kids on her own, but what I remember the most is going to the mall with my mom and eating lunch with her. I loved getting on the bus and heading out to the Cerritos mall. It was a favorite thing of mine.

I also remember going to amusement parks as a whole family, which never has happened since I have had children. My whole family doesn't do things together usually. It is okay though because my girls will build family memories with us.

Since moving away from everyone and everything we have ever known I have been making sure to keep my girls spirits up. I don't want them to ever be sad that our family is miles away. I am glad that we have each other, and we will continue on with building special moments that we one day will look back on.

Today we are going to head out with my brother and his wonderful kids and fiancée. They are in Vegas for a few days, so let more memories be built. 

Need help

That moment you've tried everything and it seems as though your kids still don't

listen. It is so hard, because I've tried it all and still they aren't listening. No this doesn't make me a bad mother, it makes me " a mother".

 

Sariah and Kamille seem to be working in cahoots with one another. I cant for the life of me figure out what it is I can do. I feel like I've tried everything. I have went through all their toys and got rid of a bunch. I take away their DS games. No Netflix, ipad or any electronics. It doesn't phase them.

 

Now im sure a few are thinking "just whoop them girl". Only if that worked. Some children don't care about a getting whooped. That would be mine. Being whooped doesn't always help, trust me. I know a few that used to get their behinds whooped and they are not better off than before.

 

So what is left to do? They are 4 and 5 years old. I cant make them do standards they wouldn't understand why. I can make them do community service because they are to little. So, what is left?

 

Has anyone else had this issue and overcome it? Please let me know. I know that I cant be the only one that is experiencing this.

 

I don't feel incapable of punishing them. I just feel like what I am doing is not working anymore. They are very strong headed girls. I cant be mad at that because so am I. I wasn't the best child and we all know that.

Listening was not my forte. So if anyone had any suggestions that might help, please let me know. Thank you everyone.

"YOU ARE A MOTHER"!!!

From the moment you think "I might be", to the moment you find
out "I am" "You are a mother". Even if you never heard the heart beat "You are a mother". Just because you didn't get to feel their kick "You are a mother". Even though you never will get to take them home, "You are a mother". So what you had to give them up for adoption "You are a mother". If you didn't get the chance to watch them grow because they got their angel wings earlier than expected "You are a mother". Its okay you had to play mommy and daddy. "You are a mother".

"I am looking forward to seeing the kind of person my son will be. His little personality and his little smile. I am a mother".

"I hate the teenager years, the mood swings, the "mad"itudes for no apparent reason. I am a mother".

"They are my motivation to pull through in life. I am a mother".

"I hate that because I have spoiled them rotten that when I say I don't have it, they don't understand. I am a mother".

"I love the unconditional love that each kid gives to me. I am a mother".

"I hate that I cant protect them from the pain and hurt in the world. Having to let them make their own mistakes. I am a mother".

Regardless of your situation "you are a mother". Some say that if you don't
physically have the child you are not. I say other wise. I celebrate each and everyone of you today. "You are a mother".

"I love the thoughtful things my children do/say without being asked. I am a mother".

"I am not looking forward to the dark thoughts I know will come at night. That I am not able to be the mommy I want to be. I am a mother".

"I love that becoming a mother exposed me to the world of holistic health care. I am a mother".

"I hate mommy wars. I am a mother".

"I love the simple joy that my daughter finds in life, like bubbles and flowers. I am a mother".

"I hate the first trimester of pregnancy. All the sickness its awful. I am a mother".

In life we have obstacles. Some that are easy and some that we really have
to work hard to overcome. Becoming pregnant is one of those obstacles. For some there mere thought of a baby gets them pregnant. That isn't the case for everyone. Some may never get to experience the joys of motherhood through the womb., but by adoption. "You are a mother".

"I love the immediate indescribable love you feel for your kids. I feel it most at night while rocking mine to sleep. I am a mother".
"I hate that I cant ever give up. It is especially hard when I have so much going on in life and I cant deal. I am a mother".

"I love seeing my child apply something that I taught. I am a mother".

"I hate that my kids are old enough to make their own decision and I have to accept them, even though I know the are making a mistake. I am a mother".

"I love that when I am down and out and thinking negative thoughts about leaving this place, just thinking about my kids saves me. I am a mother".

"I am not looking forward to my post-partum body. I am a mother".

Being a parent is a different experience for everyone. Sometimes we get pregnant and we don't feel like it is our time to become a mother. We aren't ready. We think about "do I keep it, get rid of it, what am I going to do"? Adoption becomes an answered pray to some family. "You are a mother".

" I love seeing her every morning and every night just smile at me. I'm finally a real mommy, and it's such a great feeling. I am a mother".

"I hate that he is so far away and there is nothing I can do about it. I never regret my decision to place him for adoption, but sometimes I wish circumstances had been different when he was born so I could have him now. I miss him so much, and there will always be something missing in my heart, but I know I gave him the world. Had I kept him, he probably wouldn't be in my custody now. I am a mother".

"I love watching my son grow. Watching him reach milestones and seeing his personality shine through. I am a mother".

"I hate I feel like I failed my daughter, because I picked a man wouldn't be my husband or a father to her. I am a mother"."

"I am looking forward to breastfeeding. I know it is going to be difficult, but I want to bond/connect and look into her eyes. I am a mother".


"I hate people questioning my parenting especially when I didn't ask for an opinion. I am a mother".

Just because things didn't play out the way you wanted you haven't failed. Sometimes life gets in the way. We do things we aren't proud of, and make choices we soon regret. "You are a mother".

"I love that we will always be a family despite our situation. I am a mother".

"I hate the anxiety that comes with motherhood. I constantly doubt myself, am I doing everything right. I am a mother".

"I love spending time with my daughter, watching her grow and blossom into the young lady she is. I am a mother".

"I hate feeling alone with our kids even though I have a husband home. I am a mother".

"I love that I am able to witness her many talents. She bring joy and
happiness to my heart. I am a mother".

"I hate my pregnancies are so hard that I never get to enjoy them. I am a mother".

     Psalms 127:3 

Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward.

No matter how you were blessed with them, they are your gifts. Love them and cherish the moments you have together. It may get rough, you may lose sleep. But, their are women dying to have the opportunity to become a mother. Don't take it for granted.

No one may ever tell you this but only once a year, and to me that is not enough. We moms are under appreciated. From one mother to the next I will celebrate you and this wonderful thing we get to call motherhood. Lets make a difference in the world. Not judging each other but uplifting one another. I love you all and believe in you. No matter what circumstance you are in or have been in.
                                                             "YOU ARE A MOTHER"!!!

 

 

 

.

My day!

Today was a lazy kind of day, really didn't do to much. Not feeling too good if you ask me. I did although

head over to the college to see about not retaking the placement test. I finally received my transcripts. It seems like forever. I guess because I am not physically in Long Beach. They make you download a page, print it out sign it, and then fax it over.

It felt like I had to pull teeth in order to get "my" transcripts, but I did it. Thank God. Anyways I have to go back Monday to talk with The English department and Math department so they can give me my classes. I am so blessed to take the first few steps so I can go back to school and further my education again. If I could I think I would stay in school forever, I actually enjoy it...

After that we went to target for a few items and then back home. Like I said my body isn't feeing well. Not sure if it is this heat that is getting to me or what. I cant be sick though I have 3 little ones depending on my every move... HELP!!! LOL. Ill be fine though.

Now we are watching the movie "Cars" Logan actually sits and pays attention. It is so cute. I think he is more alert than Sariah and Kamille were at his age. Babies these days are so smart and much more advanced.

While watching the movie, Kamille is attempting to make my hair look like Elsa from the movie FROZEN!!! She does this at least twice a day, it is so sweet. She acts like she is making a YouTube video for her fans. LOL.

Bath time is next for them and then story time. Hopefully they will call it a night early because mommy needs some quite time. I am so excited for this blog that I am doing for tomorrow. I cant wait, and I  really am hoping that everyone is going to enjoy it.

I am so grateful for all that sent in. It makes this blog that much more special. Well everyone it is an early night for me. I have a lot to get together in order to make my blog special in the way I want. Have a great night.

A quick message to my readers.

Inspiration is something that I look for when I look for friends, other mothers or people just in my circle. If when I see you or talk to you all you can do is be negative I cant continue to be around. If you cant see the vision it wont come to pass.

As a mother times get hard but I push through. I may cry all the way through but at least I didn't give up. I see what is in store for my future and no one can change what God has planned out for me. No one. I  am finally walking in my purpose, and loving every moment.

I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I am headed there. I couldn't be more excited, and I want to take you all on the journey with me. That's why I have started blogging. I want to be able to look back over my life and read my every thought, emotion and feelings.

I hope that these blogs are something that you look forward to when you get a free moment to sit down and read. I know that I enjoy writing them. It just flows so naturally out of my belly and into the computer. I don't even have to cluster my thoughts on paper. I just sit down and start writing.

Each day I may not write as many as the others, but know that I am constantly thinking about topics I want to touch on. Doing this is allowing me to help someone out there. I can feel it in my bones. My advice may not be for you in particular, but I hope that it still touches you in a way that can help someone in your circle.

I just wanted to take a few seconds to say, "I appreciate you, yes you". The ones that are taking time to read my blogs. I never thought I would actually do it because I was afraid of rejection from people.

I didn't have a father growing up so I always felt rejected, and no matter what anyone says it plays a big role in a girls life. After lots of failed relationships with family, friends, boyfriends. I love where I am today. I have an amazing husband, 3 beautiful babies and a place I can call my own. "daily diaries of their mom"!!!

Thank you again!

Thoughts in our head!!!

Why cant I do everything like her? She really seems to have it together. Dang, she even has more kids than me. What is going on with me. Am I even fit to be their mom?

I saw this after writing my blog, and
said yes this is totally for my blog.

Sometimes as a mom these thoughts can enter your mind, even if you wont admit. Which lets face it most of you wont. You cant even admit when your frustrated for the fear of someone judging you. I say judge away if you want, it makes me no difference.

I am so far from being "the perfect mom", but I honestly don't want to be quote on quote perfect. I love being who I am. Human. I feel everything from pain, hurt to sadness as well as joy, happiness and love. Some turn those feelings off. I love being in touch with my emotions because it allows me to be a better mom to my kids.

When they are hurting, I hurt, and when they are happy, I am happy. Me and my children are in sync with one another. Which is very important to me. I can tell at the drop of a dime when something is not right with them. I don't even have to hear them cry or see their faces down and out.

Paying attention to their body language and they way they eat is a big part of knowing if something is wrong or not. Never for a second should you second guess the decisions in life you make. Most of the time your first instinct is usually right on point. Lets be honest, if you are second guessing yourself why wouldn't the world?

Just because someone seems like they "have it together", doesn't mean they are even close. People it is called great acting skills. God made us all different, no two people are the same. He didn't do that by mistake either.

We are designed to handle situations different and children different. That way we can intervene with help if something isn't working out for a friend or family. I love to get advice from seasoned folks. Now let me elaborate.

Please don't give me your unsolicited advice if I haven't asked. That can make the situation at hand way worse. If I do come to you please know it is because I really and truly would appreciate your help. Moms stick firm to this. Don't allow people to make you feel bad and less than. If you don't want the help let them know in a respectful manner.

A lot of times mother to mother, we over step our boundaries. You can lose family and friends for this. It isn't our place to judge someone, when half of the time we probably don't even have half of or shit together. Just being honest.

Don't doubt yourself. God saw fit for you to be the mom to your child/children. He is never wrong. So pull up your big girl panties and your mom cape, and rule the world. Okay well your household world. LOL. Hope you have an amazing day.

The best part of my day!!!

The best part of my day is night. Giving all my kids their baths and then choosing the stories that we are going to read for the night. Usually the girls choose a chapter book because they feel older. Anything pleases them at this age. Currently we are reading the Junie B books which are kind of amusing if you ask me.

After the girls have had their books or book read it is milk time and good night (hopefully). Going to sleep is not their favorite part of the day. That will change one day though. For now its like pulling teeth. We say our prayers together and then I hope that they will be quite enough for me to get little man to sleep.

Once I am finished with them, Logan gets his special bath then lotion time. One thing I can say is after a baby has had a bath if you spend time massaging them with a calming lotion, it makes going to bed a lot faster. Just a little tip. Anyways after getting him dressed me and him choose three kid (baby) books (yes I said, me and him). The little ones that are hard pages.

I love seeing his eyes open up so wide when we are reading. I mean this little boy become fixated with the story. So cute I tell you. We either finish bed time with "I love you, goodnight" (which I just picked up and am so in love with) or "Love you forever" (my all time favorite).

Then night light with moving pictures and music is on. I say a prayer with him and rock him back and fourth till he is out. It melts my heart watching my kids sleep. The best feeling in the world is knowing "they are mine, all mine".

It is a reward everyday to me watching them rest so peacefully. Being a mother is such a hard job. One that most get no credit for, nor do we ask for it. Just seeing them in their beds tucked in under the covers lets me know "Kayleigh, you are doing a great job". It is nice to hear those words from time to time, but as long as my kids are alive and healthy I feel accomplished.

I am a blessed women and if all else fails in my life, at least I have my children. They will always love me despite my flaws. I am grateful for them.

Make it fun!!!

Food is so important. Although a lot of kids just want junk all day, its your job to explain why they need good healthy food. I am not perfect with healthy food. I do let my girls indulged in chips and cookies. I wont deprive them of the things they really like. It is all about moderation people. So here are a few tips.

How I make my kids eat all their food (yes, even their veggies):

1. Don't give them too much (remember their belly is small)
2. Make there food look fun (finger foods, colorful veggies even skewers).
3. Let them know they cant have anything else (if they cant eat what's given, then they need nothing else for the night (Even if they get hungry).
4. No desert for the night (That means no ice cream, even if the other kids get ice cream stick to it, and be firm. Explain to them, and tell them "Oh, Well its your fault you should have ate).
5. Tell them how veggies make them strong and healthy (this is my kids favorite thing to hear).

A lot of kids don't understand the whole, there are people starving in other countries statement. I've tried and even showed them. It just isn't something that a 4 and 5 year old can really grasp. Making kid friendly food is a must. My girls love using their fingers. So carrots, broccoli and chicken is something we eat a lot. I make them different though. Never the same seasonings unless it is their fav, which would be BBQ chicken (wet or dry).

A great breakfast food that is simple is a burrito. They don't need anything but the burrito. That is a plus. Although their favorite thing for breakfast is pancakes, they cant have that everyday. It is fast, simple and pleases everyone. Well usually.

Lunch is simple. Sandwiches, noodles or chicken nuggets. They love the white chicken breast

dinosaurs. They could eat them all the time. I still make them sides too. Sariah's fav thing at the moment is salads. She actually told me today "mom I want to be a vegetarian". I have no idea where she got that from, lol. Kids.

Dinner is always different, but if you let them help you make it 9 times out of 10 they will eat it. Just for the simple fact that they made it. That is sometimes all a kid needs to help prepare the food. It also gives you some special time with them. Memories are important.

Just make sure that if its something you wont eat don't make it. A lot of times kids are like the parents. Now if you don't eat veggies, still make those because they are very good for the kiddos. Hope your kids start to eat more.

None of the pictures above are mine. I just wanted to show some idea.

Be their encourager!!!

Sariah on her first day of kindergarten.

Encouraging your kids is vital to how much they actually take in while learning at school. You should not leave all the teaching and rewarding up to the teacher. Yes we send our kids to school so that they get an education., but remember that is only the first steps.

When I would pick Sariah up from school everyday I always made sure to ask three questions.

1. How was school today?
2. What did you learn?
3. Did you get homework?

On our drive home she would tell me about her day and what she learned. This probably had to be the best part of the day as a parent. I loved hearing her talk. Listen parents this is key, because had I not asked Sariah how her day was I would have never known that a little boy beat her up. If the child isn't acting normal and seems timid or has their head down, chances are something happened. If they aren't willing to talk about it, you need to turn around and speak with the teacher. This happened a few times. Riri wouldn't tell me what happened, so I would go to her teacher, and she would explain what happened and why Sariah was upset. Communication is a big factor no matter who old or young they are. Once you stop talking to them about things, don't be surprised if they keep things bottled up inside and lash out. I've seen this happen before.

You may be thinking "lash out, my kid is only in kindergarten" Yes, honey it happens. Our kids aren't like the kids we were when we went to school. This generation is much more smart. They see more,

Sariah loves school.

hear more, and do more. 

When asking the question "what did you learn"? Make sure you are asking for full details. Have them explain. For an example. If they say "today we learned about the earth" your question would be "Great, now what about the earth did you learn"? So on and so fourth. I don't think I need to elaborate any more, right? Great, hopefully you got it.

Learning is so important for them at whatever age they are. When they are babies we want them to  learn how to talk, walk, grab things. So when they get older why should it be any different?

Something that my girls loved to do was head out to the library on Wednesdays to check out books. Sariah usually would find books related to what she was learning about at school. She is so smart, and I am blessed to be her mom. We would come home and Riri would tell Kamille about what she had learned. Now Mimi was learning. Your kids can help teach the younger ones. It an added bonus.

This is the most important part of your child's day. Homework time!!! Parents don't slack on this part of the day. Yes, you had a long day at work, the baby is screaming, your husband is driving you crazy, you probably just burned the dinner. I get it, I have 3 kids its not always easy. Just remember if you don't have your kids do homework you are only setting them up for failure.

Sariah would come home every Friday with two new packets of homework, due the next week on Thursday. One would be writing, reading, home connections and the second math. Depending on how many pages of homework she had, would depend on how long we took. I usually had her do 3 a day. Even on the weekend. Our favorite part about homework time, was our one on one time together. I included Kamille in the reading portion because we did it before bed.

I learned a lot about Sariah when helping her out with homework. My daughter is very self conscious about herself and is afraid that people are going to judge her if she does something wrong. This is where parents have to intervene and lift your child's spirits up. Be their encourager!

She still battles with this, but it is something I am working with her on. I see so much potential in her, and I let her know that. If they are struggling in certain areas in school, talk to their teachers. They can give them extra work, and or recommend great "free" websites to use for pintable's.

My homemade packets for Sariah.

Kamille has homemade homework packets
as well.

My favorite place to go is Barnes and Noble. I love to buy there learning activity books. I have the member ship so I get 15% off. It is a must for how often I shop there. I buy them for both girls. They have age one or grade. It just depends on what you want.

Hopefully you have learned a few key tips, school is almost here again. Remember our kids are the next Doctors, Lawyers, Nurses, Engineers and much, much more.

Evolving!

I notice a lot of people seem to wonder why I don't act the same or hang with the people I grew up with. The answer is "I am not that girl from middle school and high school that you remember". I have grown and don't have time for the petty BS. I see a lot of the people I went to high school still stuck in the same rut. I am not about that life, sorry. Wait, no I am not sorry that I got out and did what I had to do for my family.

I have grown and plan on continuing to grow even more. I see so much for my future and am so excited with where God is taking me. Although I love reconnecting with people from my past, don't get mad if I don't accept your friend request or want to "hang". I am not better than anyone, but I also have a purpose in life and back sliding into my old life is not for me.

That Kayleigh is gone and not coming back. We learn as we get older what we want out of life, friends and family. Trust if family does something horrible enough I wont hang with them either. I just want better for me and my family. There is nothing wrong with that.

One thing I see a lot is people being afraid to let go of the things that may hold them back in life. I cant do that. Being afraid is not an option for me. I still can remember being pregnant and thinking "wow my life is changing". Literally right before my eyes I was loosing friends. At first it hurt, but then I figured "they aren't apart of this chapter in my life".

I see it now as a blessing. I don't want to hang out in the hood and smoke weed all day. Scared that my kids might end up with a bullet in them because of who I hang with. Trust it happens all the time. So if you ever wonder why is Kayleigh changing, I'm not. I changed along time ago, and am now evolving into the women I am suppose to be.

If we stay the same its like we die. Never becoming anything better than what we are now, it should be a sin. I personally don't want to be where I am today in 10 years. Not that where I am is bad, but I have much more potential to become something greater and better.

Becoming a mother has made me become stronger not only physically, but mentally and emotionally. There really isn't anything that you can say or do to me that would break me. My kids have given me some really thick skin. I am grateful, because I use to lash out at anyone for anything. Now I am learning how to control myself.

A year ago if you said something to me that pissed me off you wouldn't want to stick around. I would have chewed you up and spit you out like you were dirt in my mouth. I realized that this wasn't good. My girls witnessed me go off one time because someone said something to them and all hell broke loose. I felt bad after because my girls asked me "mommy were you going to fight them"? That is something that I never want my girls to witness. I had to do some soul searching and figuring out how I could control my anger.

I had to figure out were it came from and learn how to keep it in the dark. Now when I get pissed off at something I try to just leave it alone. Its not worth being ignorant for, yes fighting as an adult is ignorant (in my book). I am glad I learned now before my girls caught on and started acting like that.

I am changed and proud of the women I have become. I'm even more excited to see where and who I will be in the next couple of years. I see the vision, now its time to be productive in at.

A fun place.

Fun activities are a must with the kiddos. No matter where we live we always have fun... Guess what

Los Angeles isn't the only place to have fun with them either.

I don't think kids should be trapped in the house, so find fun things in your area. Some places are free in your local areas and some cost a little bit of money. If the kids really enjoy the places you can always apply the ticket to the season pass. It just has to be purchased that day.

My girls are very into science, animals and the earth. So we go a lot of museums. Which low key, I love too. Today we decided to try out the Nevada Spring Preserve. http://www.springspreserve.org/coming_soon/coming_soon.html

We totally had fun. They have indoor miniature golf, outside animals, fossils. You name it they probably had it. It did cost to get it, but not a lot. We paid $24.95 for all of us. It opens at 10am -6pm.
Which is great for the kids. On site is a dining area, gift shop and library. Winning.

It was very fun. Inside they do a live animal show. Two different hours in the day. So if you miss the first one you can go to the next. They ask for participation too, so that is a plus. Although my kids cried because they didn't get picked. LOL.

My favorite part (hey parents can have fun too) was the flash flood the do. Mimi was so scared, but not Riri or Logey Bear.

All in all it was fun I am glad that we went.

Now I know that for the most part you that most stay in the greater Los Angeles are, so here are a few fun places my girls loved.
In no particular order:

1. Los Angeles Zoo (it was cheaper to buy a pass for my whole family)
2. California Science center ( The Endeavor exhibit is a must see)
3. Brea tar pit (I loved going her when I was a kid)
4. Aquarium of the pacific (not my favorite thing)
5. Long beach library (my girls are simple)
6. Santa Ana Zoo (The park is amazing)

Now there is so much more to do and see, but these are just a few. Hope you enjoy taking your
kiddos out. Let the fun times begin.

How to keep the balance.

I asked for people to name topics that they wanted me to blog about for them to read. Long and behold most actually had the same concerns. Some expressed them on my "daily mom confessions" page and some in boxed me. Either way I automatically knew this is something I want to blog about.

We all handle things differently because we are not built the same. Physically, mentally and emotionally we all run on different levels. What may make me feel unequipped and get me sad and depressed might not even phase you. 

They only way I was able to keep a balance is because I battled with what one would call PPD "postpartum depression". I had a very bad case of it. Now I wasn't affected by this after Sariah, but with Kamille. It knocked me straight on my ass. Everything in me was fighting it, but nothing worked. I didn't know what to do. I ended up in the hospital so many times because I literally thought " I am dying, today is the day. I feel it". PPD is that bad. It causes you to have panic attacks and very bad anxiety. It isn't a joke at all.

Finally I took myself to Mental Health (yes I left by pride at home). They sent me to a psychologist because they said "you don't belong here, your not crazy". Well I sure felt crazy as hell. I started seeing a psychologist but noticed this is not going to work either. He was weird as ever wanting to talk about when I was a baby. Like I remembered that. LOL.

I was so lost and had no one that I could talk to about it. I've learned that a lot of people are afraid to be themselves and be open. I am not. You ask me something and I usually am an open book. What I went through I believe is to help someone else.

I went to my primary care physician and expressed my concerns about what was going on. She recommended Medication. At this point I was willing to try anything to get better. I had two kids depending on me. The first medication she started me on made things worse. I felt like the walls were caving in on me. Yes it is that bad.

Finally we found a medication that actually worked for me. The only problem was now I was sleepy all the time and hating life. I had to figure out what I could do. I decided that I needed to find an outlet to help me.

I knew that I didn't want to be on the medication anymore. I stayed away from excess amounts of coffee, made sure to keep the house bright. Get out of the house and do stuff with the girls. I learned what worked for me. I stopped taking the medication. Now I use to keep it on me just in case, but thank God I never needed it again.


If I felt like I was about to have an attack, I would suck on a hard piece of candy, and it worked.

This is how I learned how to keep the balance.

I was always to fixated on what the girls needed that I forgot about myself. You cant do that it will only make your life miserable. Just because you become a mother doesn't mean that you die. If anything it just starts a new chapter in your book. I mean that's what we are doing here, writing our book. Our stories aren't the same ever because then the book would be boring and not unique.

When the girls take a nap, I get some "Me time in". I watch my shows, surf the web, catch up on YouTube. Things that make me happy. That make me "ME".  I noticed that when I would work I never bought myself anything. I literally got paid and took the girls out shopping. This is a good thing to a certain extent. You have to treat yourself to something. Now don't get me wrong please provide for you children, but if they don't need anything and you do, make sure to choose you this time.

It is hard, I know. I love my kids with all that is in me, but mommy has needs too. Once you stop doing for you, you've already messed with the balance. It can and will have a negative affect on you. My girls know mommy needs space and they try to help I can tell., but remember they are kids don't expect too much. This is were the saying "it takes a village to raise kids" comes in.

Never be afraid to ask for help. If you have great friends and you are loosing it, ask. If you aren't a single parent tell your husband or boyfriend what's going on. Don't bottle it up and keep it in. It isn't healthy at all. No one is going to judge you, and if they do, they aren't any good for you.

Another great way to stay balanced is find other moms with kids around your kids ages. Schedule weekly play dates and let the kids be. While they are playing you and the kids mom can have some adult time. Trust me talking to kids all day, this will do you some good. I love hanging with other moms because they get you and understand certain frustrations.

Find your outlet. It can be writing (which is my favorite), singing, dancing, reading. Anything that allows you to just openly breath and get back to "YOU". You aren't dead, you are very much alive. Becoming a mother is the best thing in this world and also the hardest., but it isn't rocket science.

In staying balanced we are all going to have our own ways. Remember are make ups are different. No two people are the same. Not even twins. I promise you it only gets easier as time progresses and you learn more about yourself and kids.

I hope this helped someone, anyone. I am always here to help talk if need be. Who am I to judge?