The next chapter in my book...

I am not sure if anyone actually reads these or not, but I still feel a need to share...

I started my journey a little over a month now and boy has it been rough for me. I knew it wasn't going to be easy when I started and I am not expecting it to be, but I really want to see results. I am working out hard and eating clean. Before I get into full detail let me give you a little back story to why I decided to embark on this next chapter in my life...

Since giving birth to my beautiful baby boy I have noticed a dramatic change in my body and have lost myself. I don't remember it being this hard with my first two, which are my princesses. I have tried to start working out many of times and then a week into it I become unmotivated to continue. So, I do what is easy and give up... Not very smart of me, but at least I can become transparent with you all (whoever you are)...

So, once we finally made the decision that we are staying in Nevada, I located a doctor and made an appointment. A little disclaimer (Don't wait until everything in your body is going wrong, I should have went over a year ago before I actually saw my physician, but I was scared to hear what the doctor would tell me).  I had been having chest pains for quite sometime and was always tired and out of breath, even if I was just walking up the stairs to my house. I started to always taste salt in my food (like everything, even if no salt was added to it). I would swell up even though I have always watched my salt in take (I cant even wear my whole wedding ring, I am only wearing one band). Always dizzy and very off balance. I knew things were off with myself.

I met with my doctor and explained all my concerns and he actually listened to me (I have worked for many doctors that don't). He ordered tests and sent referral's immediately. He told me that it would take a few weeks of course to get approvals but, in the mean time to go do blood work.

Although I have not been to all my appointments yet because they don't have many new appointments open right away, I did get my blood work back. I received a letter in the mail explaining that I am pre-diabetic and some instruction for me, also that I needed to follow up with my doctor as soon as possible.

I meet with him and we went over a few things that I could do to insure that I wont become a diabetic. Foods to stay away from, as well as some exercises that I never knew could help. I went to MA school (Medical Assisting) and never heard that weight training and resistant band training can help the diabetes flee. I have also changed the way that I eat. I am very consistent with watching all starches, because they are very bad for you.

So while I am still waiting on future tests for all my other issues I figured now is the time to get healthy.

A few things that I have changed:

• no fried foods
• no soda or added sugar drinks
• cutting out white rice, pasta, potatoes and white bread
• nothing greasy
• working out (at least 30 mins cardio everyday, and weight training/resistant band as well)
• WATER, WATER AND MORE WATER
• did I mention WATER!!!

There is a lot that is going into this journey but, this is just some of it. I have a beautiful family that needs me and how can I be here for them if I am not healthy? I cant. So, I would love to start an accountability group, If anyone reading this is interested please let me know, and I will do a blog about it... 

Thank you all for taking the time to read  my blogs and know that I love you all for reading... TTYL!!!

Am I the only one?

It seems like there are not enough hours in the day to do all the things you want to and need to do. You wake up get yourself ready and then the kids. Give them breakfast, drop them off at school (if they are in school) and then run errands. By which now it is time to go to work. You do your job then get off and get home around 9:40 pm or later, eat dinner hop in the shower and sit down to relax and realize you didn't get everything accomplished.

Mimi and Riah!!!

Am I the only one that feels like this? I cant be!!! I would not change my life for anything even  though I am sure I have big bags under my eyes, half my makeup smeared off and I'm sure my kids are climbing up the walls, lol. I am just kidding people, calm down already................

Well now that the kids are out of school and its time to prep them for next year. I am so excited to be having two children in elementary now. Riah just got her final grades in and she has made me very proud. She made Honor Roll again. That makes for all year!!! My baby is doing so well in school. I couldn't be any more proud of her.

Mimi is counting down the days now till Kinder. My big baby girl has been so patient when it comes to school. She is already 5, but because of being a December baby she had to wait. She keeps asking "Is school tomorrow?" LOL!!! My big baby girl cant wait.

Logey Bear!!!

Logey Bear is finally walking everywhere. You cant get that boy to sit, but when he is sleeping. It is the cutest thing ever in life. He kind of runs while walking, if you can picture that. It is a beautiful thing. People always say that each baby is different and it is so true. This baby is truly a boy, Wholeheartedly. He lets you know when he is mad. I am working on him right now with his cute but very hard attitude. He has a thing for hitting and throwing things when you tell him "no". So, with that being said we are working with him right now.

My life is so full right now and I am truly blessed. Regardless of the craziness I call "LIFE" it is my life and I am grateful to be in it. I love my beautiful family. It is all mine!!!

I love you for reading and I hope that you enjoyed... Till next time... Peace, Love and Blessings!!!

Finally, Back again!!!

I am so excited to be back!!!

That moment that you sit back and say to yourself " Why am I wasting time and not doing the things that I love?"... I started this blog because I had things to say and I wanted to be able to help other moms and or women in general. What is going on Kay?

Well, everyone if anyone even cares "I AM BACK!!!".

I have been wondering when I would get the strength to get back at it and now I feel great. It has been so long..... I guess I should catch everyone up on what has been going on...

For one I am no longer a stay at home mom anymore ( I actually do miss it) this momma is a working...LOL. My oldest is almost finished with first grade and has maintained A/B Honors all year long (proud mommy moment). My second daughter is getting anxious for kinder next year, she even asked "Do I start tomorrow?" to the lady in the office, and my baby boy is already 1 and walking around getting into everything. I tell you I don't know where the time has gone. Next thing I know they are going to be asking "Mom, can I go out with my friends?", and I will be home crying my eyes out because my home is empty...

I tell you hold onto them and enjoy every moment you have with them. They are so special and precious to me. I am truly a blessed women.

I for one am looking forward to an amazing summer. With the trials and tribulations that I have experienced in 2014/2015 thus far, I am grateful I haven't jumped of the ledge (metaphorically speaking people). Well with that being said I just summed up very briefly what has been going on in our lives and I cant wait to get back into the world of blogging. I love it very much and cant wait to poor my heart back into it....

She is growing!!!

Finally I have sometime to just sit down at my computer and put my thoughts in it. I have been so busy with Sariah starting school and adjusting to her not being her. It has been crazy, but I think that I got it all down packed now.

I cant believe how fast time has gone. My oldest is already in first grade and I so feel like I just had her. Her birthday is in less than two weeks and I don't know where the time has gone too. As I sit back and think about the moment I found out that I was pregnant with her, I remember being scared and nervous, while feeling joy and excitement. I was scared because 5 months prior I had just lost a baby. I didn't know if anything was going to happen during my pregnancy with her. Although I gained more than I would have liked to with her she was by far the easiest pregnancy.

August 25, 2014 was her first day of First grade, as we walked to school I felt those same feelings all over again (scared and nervous, while feeling joy and excitement). Weird, but so real. I look at her now and thank God for this little one. When I am not feeling well about myself (confidence) she always finds a way to let me know that she loves me and thinks that I am beautiful no matter what. How lucky am I?

My baby isn't a baby anymore, but she will always be "my baby". I am grateful for her attitude about life, school, friends and family. For only being 5 she is very smart. She notices everything around her (so i have to be careful with what i say because she totally gets it). It has its positive and negative sides to it. LOL!!!

Well She is now becoming a big girl totally not a little toddler girl. Who was I to think that she was going to stay a little innocent girl that is totally oblivious to life? Crazy. I have a smart, beautiful, talented princess on my hands.

I love you Sariah. You are already doing well in first grade. Mommy and daddy are very thankful that God decided to give you to us.

I love you for reading. Thanks again.

Do you!!!

"I need a break from the kids, I just want some me time". Can anyone else relate to this? I am almost

I took some time for myself, and I enjoyed
every moment. Tamar and I at her concert.
Meet and greet baby!!!

sure that every mom goes through this. I see a lot of people asking me questions about not losing themselves. Well I believe that the one way is to definitely have some mommy me time.

Some moms are scared to take a few hours to themselves. I am not saying that you need to leave the country and go away for a week. Just a couple of hours away will do you some good. I know that I like to take a trip to the nail shop and then to Barnes and noble. That is me though. There are so many things that you can do in a short amount of time that will take you away from all the madness going on at home. Yes I did just say madness.

When your house looks like a tornado went through it, and the kids are screaming at each other and fighting. When your husband seems like he has a stick up his ass. It is time to do something for you. You deserve it. You are the glue that holds the family together so why shouldn't you go out and take your mind away for a second?

Since moving away from my friends and family I have only done a few things for me. My most favorite thing was going to Tamar Braxton's concert. Yes, I went by myself and had the time of my life. I notice that having kids has given me the courage to step out on my own. Something that I would have never done back home if I didn't have kids.

I am starting to find "Myself". This is something a lot of moms struggle with. Your whole identity is not "mom". Don't ever forget that. That is only apart of who you are, not a whole. Once you can look in the mirror and recognize this then you will finally be able to set a side a day and time for just you.

For me it is hard because I stay at home with the kids and Shawn is always working to provide for our family, but if he is home for the day mommy is stepping out to do her. I don't do clubs because I don't like to be around a bunch of ignorant people that can only seems to express themselves because they have been drinking. Now I am not judging those of you that like the club, but this momma say "No Thank You".

If you don't feel good about yourself and know who you are, how can you teach your children to find who they are? It is impossible. We give so much of ourselves that we end up losing "us". It is time to take some of "you" and treat it with love and care. I say "date yourself".  Get all done up and do you. Stop worrying about what others will think and say. Who cares?

As a mom we are superheroes in our own right. Even superheroes need a break. Remember if mom isn't happy, then no one is happy. Enjoy the women that you are. Hit up the nail shop, spa or take yourself to a movie. Although, why hide all that sexy in the dark, okay!!!

I love you all for reading. I hope this helped someone.

Building memories one day at a time.

One thing that is so very important to me is making memories with my kids. If I don't then who will? Our time here on this precious earth is not guaranteed. God forbid anything were to happen I want there to be pictures and memories built of our family.

My girls like some of the most simplest things in life. Just taking a drive down to the strip and walking through the hotels, makes them happy, as does it for me. We enjoy the beautifulness of the figuring's and gardens throughout. Also they have some of the best shopping as well.

Yesterday we decided to go walking through what I think is truly a  magnificent hotel. The Wynn. I mean the view of the waterfall, and the flower garden inside is so breathtaking. My girls kept asking to take pictures. Yep, they are definitely mine.

After which we went across the street and walked around the best mall on the strip (like one that

regular people can afford, lol). My girls were so excited to watch the fashion show that they do in the center of the mall. They said " We want to do that as well". Whatever they want they can have if they put their minds to it.

I am so in love with these moments between us. Making memories is a must and as a family it is something that I cherish and keep close to my heart. When I was younger we didn't have much money, I mean my mom raised 4 kids on her own, but what I remember the most is going to the mall with my mom and eating lunch with her. I loved getting on the bus and heading out to the Cerritos mall. It was a favorite thing of mine.

I also remember going to amusement parks as a whole family, which never has happened since I have had children. My whole family doesn't do things together usually. It is okay though because my girls will build family memories with us.

Since moving away from everyone and everything we have ever known I have been making sure to keep my girls spirits up. I don't want them to ever be sad that our family is miles away. I am glad that we have each other, and we will continue on with building special moments that we one day will look back on.

Today we are going to head out with my brother and his wonderful kids and fiancée. They are in Vegas for a few days, so let more memories be built. 

"YOU ARE A MOTHER"!!!

From the moment you think "I might be", to the moment you find
out "I am" "You are a mother". Even if you never heard the heart beat "You are a mother". Just because you didn't get to feel their kick "You are a mother". Even though you never will get to take them home, "You are a mother". So what you had to give them up for adoption "You are a mother". If you didn't get the chance to watch them grow because they got their angel wings earlier than expected "You are a mother". Its okay you had to play mommy and daddy. "You are a mother".

"I am looking forward to seeing the kind of person my son will be. His little personality and his little smile. I am a mother".

"I hate the teenager years, the mood swings, the "mad"itudes for no apparent reason. I am a mother".

"They are my motivation to pull through in life. I am a mother".

"I hate that because I have spoiled them rotten that when I say I don't have it, they don't understand. I am a mother".

"I love the unconditional love that each kid gives to me. I am a mother".

"I hate that I cant protect them from the pain and hurt in the world. Having to let them make their own mistakes. I am a mother".

Regardless of your situation "you are a mother". Some say that if you don't
physically have the child you are not. I say other wise. I celebrate each and everyone of you today. "You are a mother".

"I love the thoughtful things my children do/say without being asked. I am a mother".

"I am not looking forward to the dark thoughts I know will come at night. That I am not able to be the mommy I want to be. I am a mother".

"I love that becoming a mother exposed me to the world of holistic health care. I am a mother".

"I hate mommy wars. I am a mother".

"I love the simple joy that my daughter finds in life, like bubbles and flowers. I am a mother".

"I hate the first trimester of pregnancy. All the sickness its awful. I am a mother".

In life we have obstacles. Some that are easy and some that we really have
to work hard to overcome. Becoming pregnant is one of those obstacles. For some there mere thought of a baby gets them pregnant. That isn't the case for everyone. Some may never get to experience the joys of motherhood through the womb., but by adoption. "You are a mother".

"I love the immediate indescribable love you feel for your kids. I feel it most at night while rocking mine to sleep. I am a mother".
"I hate that I cant ever give up. It is especially hard when I have so much going on in life and I cant deal. I am a mother".

"I love seeing my child apply something that I taught. I am a mother".

"I hate that my kids are old enough to make their own decision and I have to accept them, even though I know the are making a mistake. I am a mother".

"I love that when I am down and out and thinking negative thoughts about leaving this place, just thinking about my kids saves me. I am a mother".

"I am not looking forward to my post-partum body. I am a mother".

Being a parent is a different experience for everyone. Sometimes we get pregnant and we don't feel like it is our time to become a mother. We aren't ready. We think about "do I keep it, get rid of it, what am I going to do"? Adoption becomes an answered pray to some family. "You are a mother".

" I love seeing her every morning and every night just smile at me. I'm finally a real mommy, and it's such a great feeling. I am a mother".

"I hate that he is so far away and there is nothing I can do about it. I never regret my decision to place him for adoption, but sometimes I wish circumstances had been different when he was born so I could have him now. I miss him so much, and there will always be something missing in my heart, but I know I gave him the world. Had I kept him, he probably wouldn't be in my custody now. I am a mother".

"I love watching my son grow. Watching him reach milestones and seeing his personality shine through. I am a mother".

"I hate I feel like I failed my daughter, because I picked a man wouldn't be my husband or a father to her. I am a mother"."

"I am looking forward to breastfeeding. I know it is going to be difficult, but I want to bond/connect and look into her eyes. I am a mother".


"I hate people questioning my parenting especially when I didn't ask for an opinion. I am a mother".

Just because things didn't play out the way you wanted you haven't failed. Sometimes life gets in the way. We do things we aren't proud of, and make choices we soon regret. "You are a mother".

"I love that we will always be a family despite our situation. I am a mother".

"I hate the anxiety that comes with motherhood. I constantly doubt myself, am I doing everything right. I am a mother".

"I love spending time with my daughter, watching her grow and blossom into the young lady she is. I am a mother".

"I hate feeling alone with our kids even though I have a husband home. I am a mother".

"I love that I am able to witness her many talents. She bring joy and
happiness to my heart. I am a mother".

"I hate my pregnancies are so hard that I never get to enjoy them. I am a mother".

     Psalms 127:3 

Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward.

No matter how you were blessed with them, they are your gifts. Love them and cherish the moments you have together. It may get rough, you may lose sleep. But, their are women dying to have the opportunity to become a mother. Don't take it for granted.

No one may ever tell you this but only once a year, and to me that is not enough. We moms are under appreciated. From one mother to the next I will celebrate you and this wonderful thing we get to call motherhood. Lets make a difference in the world. Not judging each other but uplifting one another. I love you all and believe in you. No matter what circumstance you are in or have been in.
                                                             "YOU ARE A MOTHER"!!!

 

 

 

.

Be their encourager!!!

Sariah on her first day of kindergarten.

Encouraging your kids is vital to how much they actually take in while learning at school. You should not leave all the teaching and rewarding up to the teacher. Yes we send our kids to school so that they get an education., but remember that is only the first steps.

When I would pick Sariah up from school everyday I always made sure to ask three questions.

1. How was school today?
2. What did you learn?
3. Did you get homework?

On our drive home she would tell me about her day and what she learned. This probably had to be the best part of the day as a parent. I loved hearing her talk. Listen parents this is key, because had I not asked Sariah how her day was I would have never known that a little boy beat her up. If the child isn't acting normal and seems timid or has their head down, chances are something happened. If they aren't willing to talk about it, you need to turn around and speak with the teacher. This happened a few times. Riri wouldn't tell me what happened, so I would go to her teacher, and she would explain what happened and why Sariah was upset. Communication is a big factor no matter who old or young they are. Once you stop talking to them about things, don't be surprised if they keep things bottled up inside and lash out. I've seen this happen before.

You may be thinking "lash out, my kid is only in kindergarten" Yes, honey it happens. Our kids aren't like the kids we were when we went to school. This generation is much more smart. They see more,

Sariah loves school.

hear more, and do more. 

When asking the question "what did you learn"? Make sure you are asking for full details. Have them explain. For an example. If they say "today we learned about the earth" your question would be "Great, now what about the earth did you learn"? So on and so fourth. I don't think I need to elaborate any more, right? Great, hopefully you got it.

Learning is so important for them at whatever age they are. When they are babies we want them to  learn how to talk, walk, grab things. So when they get older why should it be any different?

Something that my girls loved to do was head out to the library on Wednesdays to check out books. Sariah usually would find books related to what she was learning about at school. She is so smart, and I am blessed to be her mom. We would come home and Riri would tell Kamille about what she had learned. Now Mimi was learning. Your kids can help teach the younger ones. It an added bonus.

This is the most important part of your child's day. Homework time!!! Parents don't slack on this part of the day. Yes, you had a long day at work, the baby is screaming, your husband is driving you crazy, you probably just burned the dinner. I get it, I have 3 kids its not always easy. Just remember if you don't have your kids do homework you are only setting them up for failure.

Sariah would come home every Friday with two new packets of homework, due the next week on Thursday. One would be writing, reading, home connections and the second math. Depending on how many pages of homework she had, would depend on how long we took. I usually had her do 3 a day. Even on the weekend. Our favorite part about homework time, was our one on one time together. I included Kamille in the reading portion because we did it before bed.

I learned a lot about Sariah when helping her out with homework. My daughter is very self conscious about herself and is afraid that people are going to judge her if she does something wrong. This is where parents have to intervene and lift your child's spirits up. Be their encourager!

She still battles with this, but it is something I am working with her on. I see so much potential in her, and I let her know that. If they are struggling in certain areas in school, talk to their teachers. They can give them extra work, and or recommend great "free" websites to use for pintable's.

My homemade packets for Sariah.

Kamille has homemade homework packets
as well.

My favorite place to go is Barnes and Noble. I love to buy there learning activity books. I have the member ship so I get 15% off. It is a must for how often I shop there. I buy them for both girls. They have age one or grade. It just depends on what you want.

Hopefully you have learned a few key tips, school is almost here again. Remember our kids are the next Doctors, Lawyers, Nurses, Engineers and much, much more.

Evolving!

I notice a lot of people seem to wonder why I don't act the same or hang with the people I grew up with. The answer is "I am not that girl from middle school and high school that you remember". I have grown and don't have time for the petty BS. I see a lot of the people I went to high school still stuck in the same rut. I am not about that life, sorry. Wait, no I am not sorry that I got out and did what I had to do for my family.

I have grown and plan on continuing to grow even more. I see so much for my future and am so excited with where God is taking me. Although I love reconnecting with people from my past, don't get mad if I don't accept your friend request or want to "hang". I am not better than anyone, but I also have a purpose in life and back sliding into my old life is not for me.

That Kayleigh is gone and not coming back. We learn as we get older what we want out of life, friends and family. Trust if family does something horrible enough I wont hang with them either. I just want better for me and my family. There is nothing wrong with that.

One thing I see a lot is people being afraid to let go of the things that may hold them back in life. I cant do that. Being afraid is not an option for me. I still can remember being pregnant and thinking "wow my life is changing". Literally right before my eyes I was loosing friends. At first it hurt, but then I figured "they aren't apart of this chapter in my life".

I see it now as a blessing. I don't want to hang out in the hood and smoke weed all day. Scared that my kids might end up with a bullet in them because of who I hang with. Trust it happens all the time. So if you ever wonder why is Kayleigh changing, I'm not. I changed along time ago, and am now evolving into the women I am suppose to be.

If we stay the same its like we die. Never becoming anything better than what we are now, it should be a sin. I personally don't want to be where I am today in 10 years. Not that where I am is bad, but I have much more potential to become something greater and better.

Becoming a mother has made me become stronger not only physically, but mentally and emotionally. There really isn't anything that you can say or do to me that would break me. My kids have given me some really thick skin. I am grateful, because I use to lash out at anyone for anything. Now I am learning how to control myself.

A year ago if you said something to me that pissed me off you wouldn't want to stick around. I would have chewed you up and spit you out like you were dirt in my mouth. I realized that this wasn't good. My girls witnessed me go off one time because someone said something to them and all hell broke loose. I felt bad after because my girls asked me "mommy were you going to fight them"? That is something that I never want my girls to witness. I had to do some soul searching and figuring out how I could control my anger.

I had to figure out were it came from and learn how to keep it in the dark. Now when I get pissed off at something I try to just leave it alone. Its not worth being ignorant for, yes fighting as an adult is ignorant (in my book). I am glad I learned now before my girls caught on and started acting like that.

I am changed and proud of the women I have become. I'm even more excited to see where and who I will be in the next couple of years. I see the vision, now its time to be productive in at.

How to keep the balance.

I asked for people to name topics that they wanted me to blog about for them to read. Long and behold most actually had the same concerns. Some expressed them on my "daily mom confessions" page and some in boxed me. Either way I automatically knew this is something I want to blog about.

We all handle things differently because we are not built the same. Physically, mentally and emotionally we all run on different levels. What may make me feel unequipped and get me sad and depressed might not even phase you. 

They only way I was able to keep a balance is because I battled with what one would call PPD "postpartum depression". I had a very bad case of it. Now I wasn't affected by this after Sariah, but with Kamille. It knocked me straight on my ass. Everything in me was fighting it, but nothing worked. I didn't know what to do. I ended up in the hospital so many times because I literally thought " I am dying, today is the day. I feel it". PPD is that bad. It causes you to have panic attacks and very bad anxiety. It isn't a joke at all.

Finally I took myself to Mental Health (yes I left by pride at home). They sent me to a psychologist because they said "you don't belong here, your not crazy". Well I sure felt crazy as hell. I started seeing a psychologist but noticed this is not going to work either. He was weird as ever wanting to talk about when I was a baby. Like I remembered that. LOL.

I was so lost and had no one that I could talk to about it. I've learned that a lot of people are afraid to be themselves and be open. I am not. You ask me something and I usually am an open book. What I went through I believe is to help someone else.

I went to my primary care physician and expressed my concerns about what was going on. She recommended Medication. At this point I was willing to try anything to get better. I had two kids depending on me. The first medication she started me on made things worse. I felt like the walls were caving in on me. Yes it is that bad.

Finally we found a medication that actually worked for me. The only problem was now I was sleepy all the time and hating life. I had to figure out what I could do. I decided that I needed to find an outlet to help me.

I knew that I didn't want to be on the medication anymore. I stayed away from excess amounts of coffee, made sure to keep the house bright. Get out of the house and do stuff with the girls. I learned what worked for me. I stopped taking the medication. Now I use to keep it on me just in case, but thank God I never needed it again.


If I felt like I was about to have an attack, I would suck on a hard piece of candy, and it worked.

This is how I learned how to keep the balance.

I was always to fixated on what the girls needed that I forgot about myself. You cant do that it will only make your life miserable. Just because you become a mother doesn't mean that you die. If anything it just starts a new chapter in your book. I mean that's what we are doing here, writing our book. Our stories aren't the same ever because then the book would be boring and not unique.

When the girls take a nap, I get some "Me time in". I watch my shows, surf the web, catch up on YouTube. Things that make me happy. That make me "ME".  I noticed that when I would work I never bought myself anything. I literally got paid and took the girls out shopping. This is a good thing to a certain extent. You have to treat yourself to something. Now don't get me wrong please provide for you children, but if they don't need anything and you do, make sure to choose you this time.

It is hard, I know. I love my kids with all that is in me, but mommy has needs too. Once you stop doing for you, you've already messed with the balance. It can and will have a negative affect on you. My girls know mommy needs space and they try to help I can tell., but remember they are kids don't expect too much. This is were the saying "it takes a village to raise kids" comes in.

Never be afraid to ask for help. If you have great friends and you are loosing it, ask. If you aren't a single parent tell your husband or boyfriend what's going on. Don't bottle it up and keep it in. It isn't healthy at all. No one is going to judge you, and if they do, they aren't any good for you.

Another great way to stay balanced is find other moms with kids around your kids ages. Schedule weekly play dates and let the kids be. While they are playing you and the kids mom can have some adult time. Trust me talking to kids all day, this will do you some good. I love hanging with other moms because they get you and understand certain frustrations.

Find your outlet. It can be writing (which is my favorite), singing, dancing, reading. Anything that allows you to just openly breath and get back to "YOU". You aren't dead, you are very much alive. Becoming a mother is the best thing in this world and also the hardest., but it isn't rocket science.

In staying balanced we are all going to have our own ways. Remember are make ups are different. No two people are the same. Not even twins. I promise you it only gets easier as time progresses and you learn more about yourself and kids.

I hope this helped someone, anyone. I am always here to help talk if need be. Who am I to judge?

My day!

Today was a great day. Do you remember my frustrations with trying to get scheduled to take my placement tests out here? Well I called and was able to find out that I had to sit and wait for them to release more dates and times. At midnight, but I did it and got my appointments. Thank God. It is two weeks out but hey it is a date.

This morning I woke up and made the best breakfast burritos ever in life. Seriously they were that good. Nom, nom, nom... LOL. Today my little man turned 4 months so that was a big deal for me. All that we have been through with him, it is a blessing to watch him get older.

Dinner was amazing, easy and yummy. It brought back so many childhood memories. I loved it and so did the girls. Riri wanted 2 of them. What a big girl.

Sariah had been bugging me to buy her these little Legos from target so I figured she deserves it. She has been being so good. I am proud of her. I mean they are only $3.99. That isn't exactly breaking the bank. So we went and they each choose something. Logan got a new book.

Logan has been pretty fussy lately because he is starting to teeth already. My poor baby. We got everyone ready for bed and it was time to read some books. The most important thing that you can do with your children, is keep a routine. It really helps the kids. After 3 books everyone was ready for bed.

Now it is "mommy me time". I am watching my pretty little liars and enjoying the silence in the house. Then shower and hitting the sheets. Its been a long day. My body is drained, thank God Shawn is off tomorrow I can sleep in. Yeah right... Nighty night everyone reading. If anyone is reading.

A Materalistic world

I am guilty of spending way to much money at times. Sometimes on things the kids or even I don't need. How about you? I think at one time or another we all are. If we can admit it. For me it was hard to admit because I thought the girls deserved everything under the sun. What I was really doing was handicapping them.

Its not enough that we live in a world full of materialistic people, and now we are making our kids the same. I have learned over the last almost 6 years that spoiling them out of control doesn't do any good or anyone. For one, kids that are spoiled rotten, usually end up like that "ROTTEN".

I noticed my girls starting to act out more and not care about the toys they had. They already knew that mommy would go out and buy new ones. The thing is we aren't rich so throwing toys away and buying new ones gets crazy expensive. Have you seen the price of toys today? Seriously insane.

I am glad that I realized this now when I can still get it under control. Truthfully my girls haven't had new toys since we moved her. So probably around 2 months. That is along time from how it use to be. Every weekend I use to take them to target and or the mall. Yes I said and/or, because sometimes I would buy them toys, clothes, jewelry and books. Ridiculous right? I can admit, I was doing way too much.

Sariah and Kamille still have some learning to do when it comes to toys, but I can say that I do see a change in their attitude about toys. Actually about life.

The other day when I was cleaning the girls room, and purging, Sariah and Kamille said "mom these are the toys that we can give to someone who doesn't have anything". Do you know how amazing that made me feel? My girls thinking about others who are less fortunate than them. Mommy must be doing something right.

Parents don't be the reason our next generation is so absorbed in the materialistic things that everything becomes about what you have and what you don't. Those that don't aren't shit is how society has made it. Let me be the first to say my mom gave me the world and then some, and I became absorbed in stuff  like that. I couldn't even appreciate the love that comes from just a card. I would honestly be pissed if you gave me an empty card. Now just the mere fact that you took the time to write your honest feelings down shows true love (family and friends).

I am glad I can see that now, and I am instilling that in the kids. Lets set positive examples for our babies. They are innocent and if we teach them to be self absorbed they will be, If we teach them to love on others and help the less fortunate then will be better people and this world would be so much better. Let them know God will reward them with more than just toys.

I cant wait to see how they are in the next few years. My kids are amazing and I like to think I had something to do with that, but I give them all the credit.

My day

Today was a pretty laid back day for the most part. Not really much to do. I took the girls out to the pool for a while. It was fun. We had the whole thing to ourselves. I wasn't mad at that. Little man didn't get in, he just watched from the side lines with his daddy. Sariah and Kamille are doing so well in the pool. They took off their life vests to show me that they are able to swim without them. My girls are growing up so fast. I feel like just yesterday they were being born. These are the moments that you have to hold onto, because before you know it they are going to be off to college and out of your house.

After spending time in the pool, we got cleaned up and headed out to do some grocery shopping. We spent about an hour or so getting food for the week and standing in line for what always seems like a life time at food 4 less. I am not sure why they cant hire people that know what they are doing. It so frustrates me. Now for the fun part putting everything away. I have to be honest downsizing so that we can save money to buy our house can make a girl go crazy.

Anyways, after doing so I noticed that I didn't have anymore trash bags. Well wait I did have one and I was holding onto it with my life. Okay just kidding. Seriously though. I really didn't want to leave, but my big girl Sariah said that she would go with me. So out again we went. Heading to our favorite store "Target". Well one of them anyways. On the way Sariah wanted to listen to music. Can anyone guess what we put in and turned all the way up?????

If you guessed Tamar then ding, ding, ding you won a trip to "getcha life"... and honey boo me and Riri got ours. I am almost sure everyone next to us and or driving past thought we were crazy. We didn't care because we were enjoying ourselves and having fun. This is what I live for. Seeing my kids happy and all from the little things in life.

I came home to find that my little man was already for bed, so it was mommy time. I put him to sleep pretty much every night. One thing that I just started doing, is reading him his own books at night because I notice that he actually enjoys it. Trust me I get he is only 4 months (in 6 more mins. as I am writing this) but you should see his eyes glow and get big, his feet start to move and he laughs. I am so in love. After reading him 3 books off my favorites list, I held him close and told him "Mommy loves you". I looked down to see that he had already fell fast asleep. In my arms he was safe and warm.

I got the girls ready for bed, then we cleaned their room. Now book time for them. Tonight it was a "Junie B" Book, which they love. Something about chapter books make them feel like big girls. So cute. Now it is time for me and my honeys guilty pleasure "love and hip hop". Nighty night. Until tomorrow.

Must have in your kids library!!!

If you don't already know books are my favorite thing to buy, now you know. I believe that they keep children grounded. If there is one thing I remember most about my child hood it was my mom reading me books. I make it a point to read 3 books before bed, unless it is chapter night. Then ill read a whole book to them. That's another book topic for later.

Today I want to talk about the 10 books every parent should have in their children's library. Starting with my favorite. Now narrowing these down was very hard. I almost love every book just as much as the other. If I could list all of the books I would, but then we would be here forever. My kids own that many books. So here we go, get your iPhone or pen and paper. Or maybe you already have a few already. Anyways hope you enjoy the quick read, and these books will take you back down memory lane.

TOP BOOKS EVERY MOTHER SHOULD HAVE IN THEIR CHILDRENS LIBRARY!!!

1. LOVE YOU FOREVER: Written by Robert Munsch
2. GOODNIGHT MOON: Written by Margaret Wise Brown
3. CORDUROY: Written by Don Freeman
4. IF YOU GIVE A MOUSE A COOKIE: Written by Laura Numeroff
5. ARE YOU MY MOTHER: Written by P.D. Eastman
6. THE LITTLE RED CABOOSE: Written by Marian Potter
7. THE NAPPING HOUSE: Written by Audrey and Don wood
8. DADDY AND ME: Written by Karen Katz
9. BROWN BEAR, BROWN BEAR, WHAT DO YOU SEE?: Written by Bill Martin jr/ Eric Carle
10. FIVE LITTLE MONKEYS JUMPING ON THE BED: Written by Eileen Christelow

NOW FOR A BONUS BOOK: WACKY WEDNESDAY: Written by Dr. Seuss

Hope you will enjoy these books as much as we do. I read these books to the girls as well as my little man. They all equally love them.